POV: You just finished a draft of the show you’re writing. Now it’s time to plan a musical Table Read.

Joyously types
: “Curtain falls. End of musical.”

💭 1. I am a genius. Watch out, Lloyd Webber. Step back, Sondheim. Here comes Mama!

Posts on Facebook: “Hey besties! I have a new musical to read through this weekend. Who is interested? (first come, first serve)”

💭 2. Do people even post on Facebook any more?
💭 3. My mom posts on Facebook. Does this mean I’m old?
💭 4. Somebody liked my post but didn’t comment. What does that mean?
💭 6. Do you want to read or not, Brad?!
💭 7. I wonder what Patti LuPone is doing this weekend. Maybe I should tag her on Twitter.
💭 8. Yo, Twitter: if it’s MY password from 4 months ago then, that should prove it’s MY account!?

Thirteen minutes later…

💭 9. This musical table read is the worst idea ever. No one wants to read what I wrote.
💭 10. …And Twitter hates me.
💭 11. I am a dumpster-fire-wrapped poop sandwich….
💭 12. Oo, I could go for a sandwich….
💭 13. When did Subway get so freaking expensive?

Ding – 1 Notification from Facebook.

💭 14. Yes! It was just a matter of time. Mama’s cuttin’ loose!
💭 15. (Man, these Subway Sun Chips are lit!)
💭 16. I mean, I guess a 26 year old male-presenting COULD play one of the elderly nuns… it’s only a table read after all.
💭 17. Maybe I should add some business for the nun to do in Scene 8. She could eat some Sun Chips!
💭 18. Do people say “lit” anymore? Does THAT mean I’m old?
💭 19. Ok… so as of right now, I have 2 people to read 11 different roles. That could work, right?
💭 20. Maybe I should just suck it up and ASK some friends to read.
💭 21. Ugh, but I don’t want to seem desperate.
💭 22. I bet Pasek and Paul don’t have this problem.
💭 23. Maybe I should post a TikTok about it. People love to help out on TikTok, right?
💭 24. I should follow Pasek and Paul on TikTok.

Googles: “How to post to TikTok about your musical table read.”

Googles: “How to remove a TikTok you accidentally posted while sitting on the toilet.”

Deletes TikTok and burns phone.

💭 25. I need to get an extrovert to adopt me so that they can help me ask friends to read my script.
💭 26. I could buy them pizza.
💭 27. I would buy them All The Pizzas if I didn’t have to ask anyone else to read.

Googles on laptop: “What kind of pizza do extroverts eat?”

💭 28. Yes, extroverted Brad, I WOULD love it if you brought your roommate to come read.
💭 29. No, I do not care that his first language is Portuguese.

Checks Facebook.

💭 30. That makes 8 readers so far. I think we can make this work!
💭 31. It’s a good sign if you get your own song stuck in your head, right?
💭 32. Where did I put that pizza coupon?
💭 33. I guess I should make copies of this script for everyone to read from.
💭 34. Photocopies cost WHAT these days?

Googles: “Can I make enough money selling Plasma to pay for pizza and photocopies?”

💭 35. Maybe I *should* cut that scene in act two that doesn’t advance the plot.
💭 36. It would save me three pages per script!
💭 37. And maybe I should have gone with the 6-inch, instead of the footlong.

Takes photo of finished stack of photocopies and posts to Facebook.

💭 38. I feel so legit. Snack on them Sun Chips, Pasek and Paul!

Spots a typo on page 1.

💭 39. Maybe I can convince everyone it was a stylistic choice?
💭 41. I will have no friends after this is over. They are all going to hate me for making me read this garbage.
💭 42. I am the worst writer in the Western Hemisphere.
💭 43. Who is now broke, because Subway, photocopies, and extrovert pizza.

Realizes it is 2023 and you could have sent everyone copies digitally.

💭 44. That settles it: I AM old.

Ding – 497 notifications from TikTok.

End of scene.

P.S.  While it is totally possible to DIY a table read for your newly-finished musical, it can be stressful and expensive. So if you want to save yourself a couple of panic attacks, excessive sandwich consumption, and extrovert pizza purchasing, check out the MusicalWriters Table Read opportunity HERE.